awesomesprout

Right... so today I'm going to berkeley to get some of my dad's things... sigh... it'll be the last time I ever go to what used to be his apartment.... It still hasn't hit me yet. One of these days... I'm not sure when I'm going to break down and mourn like I wanted to do before... As of yesterday he's been dead a month. God, I miss him so much... he was the strongest person I've ever met and had the honor of knowing...

" What have I become, my sweetest friend. Everyone I know, goes away in the end. And you could have it all, my empire of dirt. I will let you down, I will make you hurt... " - Hurt, Johnny Cash ( orig. done by NIN )

What has my life become? I mean where am I going? I know what I want to do and where I want to be.. but getting there is the difficult part. Like an apple on the highest branch of a tree. Damn, I need a ladder. I had a dream last night that involved height. Hmm...

" OH you move around like you're unbreakable, time after time you prove that you're unshakable... " - Dj Hmx with Plural, Cool baby

I'm do depressed about having to give my cats away. I can't even put it into words how much I'm hurting right now.

I also want to apologize to Maya and

koga for being so pissy yesterday but you're gonna have to learn that I am human too and tho 99.9% of the time I'm happy... I do have feelings and you're gonna seem them from time to time so the best thing to do is just let me get over and not tease me about it... yah! I'm talkin to you mr. meaney head!! :)

Anyway... I don't really know what else to write so I'm just gonna go... it's going to be a long, unhappy weekend...