You may not believe... but I'm dried up and sick to death of love....

[awesomesprout]

So. My day. AH where do I begin. Well I'm still in shock after yesterday when my roommate told me that he called my work to see if I was still employed there. That kinda weirded me out. I did talk to a cool new guy named Rob. he writes a comic strip that's really funny... if you guys want the address I can give it to you.. just ask! :0 ) So. Today was the big day where I go to my grandma's and we " talk " about my life. So I told her that I wanted to work at target.. should they hire me. I interviewed with them on uhm.... weds. I believe it was. And it looked highly promising. And she just kept telling me how awful of an idea that was blah blah blah. I finally told her that I was possibly getting fired from pacbell and that I really didn't have a choice and that at least I was looking for a job. So then she proceeded to tell me that I was a failure. That my life was a total disappointment to her and the whole family and that I've doing nothing but ruin her life as well. So I stood up without a word but I was sobbing silently. I grabbed my things and I left. I cried really hard for about 20 minutes and I drove to piedmont because my friend austin had called me to see if I wanted to go to fanimecon this weekend. I knew that he'd be free this afternoon so I went over to his work. I watched him do the register and then we decided to chill at his place and possibly do dinner. I explained to him that all the money I had was three dollars to my name until god knows when and that I need that for gas. He said that's fine and he'd pay for dinner. So I go get gas and we meet up at his place. His parents were already eating dinner and we chatted for a while cuz I hadn't seen them in a long time. His mom looks great. She's lost weight and grown her hair out. And his doggies and kitties were all out and about playing :) Plus they got a tortoise!It's sooo cool.. so his parents asked if we wanted to eat with them and we said yes :) YUmmy salad and yummy costco roasted chicken.. I was in heaven since I've been living off soup and peanut butter sandwiches for the last week. And chocolate brownies for dessert were eaten after the salad and chicken :) It was a feast in my eyes.... So then we decided to just hang out... so we played video games and watched t.v. and then he went to a friend's house and I came home. It's so hard for me right now because I feel like everything is crashing down on me at once. Like first my job. Then I have to get rid of my car. And I have no money. I don't even know how I'm gonna do rent. God I hope my insurance settlement comes through cuz god only knows when my family will ever talk to me again. I hope I hear from target. All my friends have up and moved away and the ones left are either primarily online or I've been banned from their houses for one reason or another... remind me to tell ya'll about that one sometime... and my puppy is being given away cuz I couldn't take care of it..... I have all this debt.... I don't even have 6.60 to take bart to whatever job I have left on monday. And my food supply has diminished to ramen and peanut butter. I ate the last of the soup today. And I might have some pasta. And the anniversary of my mom's death is steadily approaching in a week or so. Well... all I can say is Happy Birthday to Allen on weds. and I hope all is well with the rest of you. I can't offer much but I'm always here to listen and to help out in any way that I can.