awesomesprout: (Pissed.)
awesomesprout ([personal profile] awesomesprout) wrote2004-11-30 10:50 am

Jessica is Angry.

So be prepared to hear a lot of bitching.



I like to think of myself as a good friend. I like to think that I go out of my way to make people feel appreciated and special. And to help out when I can. And in return my friends help me. There have been a few instances that I needed help more so than others and people seemed to disappear but that's beside the point.

SO WHY IN THE FUCK did no one say happy birthday to me until I HAD TO ADMIT I CRIED?!?!?!

What the hell is that? Not a SINGLE person said happy birthday to me on LJ until I said something. That's what made me cry ladies and gentlemen. THAT is why I said it wasn't people you'd think it was.

Now, I'm probably going to get buried with comments like: " Well we did say it and it's the thought that counts. " or " Grow up. " or " Stop being so selfish. " or whatever.

I mean seriously. I fucking sent Missy a VERY nice card and sticker which had they regularly checked their mail which Dave and Missy CONSTANTLY fail to do she probably would have received it on MY birthday. But has she bothered to even make a muttering of thank you for the card? Or even a measley happy birthday? NO. I wrote a card saying that I thought the things she was doing with her life were awesome and that even if it seems like no one is watching I give her props.

I'm fucking sick of being ignored. I'm sick of being overlooked. I'm SICK OF FEELING LIKE I'M NOT APPRECIATED AND I DON'T FUCKING EXIST!

I appreciate my friends when they do things for me. And I try to show my thanks. I'm not totally ungrateful. Johanna and Alex have always been exceptionally nice to me.

I've put my social life on a sort of " put your nose in the corner " timeout. I'm not going to see my friends. I don't want to talk to anyone. And I'm going to do my own thing until I feel like I can not be angry anymore.

I've spent the last 2 weeks prior to my birthday talking about how I specifically loathe that day just for the reason that everyone acts like it doesn't exist. If you know someone who has to deal with sharing a birthday at the same time as a holiday, I feel that people should somewhat make at least minimal effort to acknowledge that it is it's own seperate thing.

I mean jesus. I came home and fucking cried for a good hour because I feel like no one gave a shit enough to say something.

Whatever. You may think I'm childish. You may think I'm being selfish. But you know what? This is how I feel about something I've had to deal with for LONG time. At least you people have normal birthdays. And get to have parties and things like that.

That's all I have to say.

Begin with the adundance of " Jessica you're out of line " comments.

[identity profile] moonlightgdess.livejournal.com 2004-11-30 04:05 pm (UTC)(link)
As a matter of fact, I have your birthday present sitting over here for the next time I see you, a present I bought a MONTH ago for your birthday. I'm fucking sorry that I've been so damn busy between school and work that I didn't have a chance to update my LJ and wish you a happy birthday. My grades and paying rent are important to me.

Thank you for the card.

[identity profile] moonlightgdess.livejournal.com 2004-11-30 06:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, and also I happened to be in the emergency room last Friday. Sorry I didn't get to a computer in time.

[identity profile] sproutchk.livejournal.com 2004-12-01 10:00 am (UTC)(link)
All I'm gonna say is this. I'm not going to turn this into a full on lj-war drama filled arguement. I saw you post in your LJ at least 2 times since my birthday. So I feel you had plenty of opportunity to say something. Also, there is NO WAY of me knowing that you had a gift. You don't ever talk to me. You never ask to hang out. So frankly, I just got the impression you didn't really give a shit. I'm sorry you're busy but it's hard for me to believe you can't take 2 seconds when I see you do other things that take just as long.

I appreciate the fact you got me a gift. I'm sorry you were in the ER. Also, there was no way of me knowing that when the first posts you make are about Geiser's party. So I was just a little ticked off by that.

So the moment has passed. It's petty. And there's no reason to continue to drag this out.

[identity profile] moonlightgdess.livejournal.com 2004-12-01 10:02 am (UTC)(link)
*shrug* whatever