Rain.

I firmly believe the weather as of late has been nothing but a pure reflection of my mood and my feeling of self worth.

The worse I feel the worse the weather has been getting.

I feel unwanted. Low. Discouraged. Frustrated. Distanced. Rejected. Hurt. Tired. Out of Control. Empty. Stressed. Afraid. Worried. Insecure.

A day has not gone by this week that I haven't cried. I even cried at work today on the shoulder of a coworker.

I haven't sold anything. We haven't had shit for customers coming in. And the ones that I do get are bad. I'm starting feel hopeless. I'm starting to feel like I'm not going to be able to do this and I'm going to just fail. Again.

I feel very very very worthless right now.

I've been reminded that I'm supposed to schedule some sort of birthday get together. I guess this weekend is as good as any. Anyone up to do something for my birthday? It'll probably just be dinner somewhere. If I hold something this weekend and you want to come please let me know so I can see if enough people are up for going.